I am done with Tinder.  Nothing can convince me that the site is full or perverted crazies that are so hard up that they are not able to function in the real dating world.  I had made plans with a guy named Joey for a nice dinner and movie.  He just had to ruin it all by texting me this afternoon that he admitingly is somewhat perverted.  I had to take a step back because who the hell would admit that they are a perv?  Well this guy did.

Second Bite at the Tinder is not Biting me Back

Am I really over 40 or is it all a dream.  I feel like I am back in high school with all the boys trying to slip their hand under my shirt just to cop a brief feel.  Of course in those virginal days I was quick to scoff at the idea and gently take their hand and place it back on their lap.  Which probably was not a good idea but you get the picture.  Fast Forward to the present with my plethora of dates and it is the same damn thing allover again.  I really got zinged with Chance and no guy is going to cop a feel or anything else until I am in a relationship, period.  So I put the theory to work that CJ was just looking for a romp in the hay.  After Friday night I knew CJ would not be his old charming pushy self. Why?  Because I would not sleep with him or let him touch my  unmentionables.

Tinder Stikes Again and this time there is no Winner.

Tinder strikes again.  Last night I had my third date with CJ.  Tinder is what brought us together.  We actually connected at the the beginning of November same time I connected with Chance.  Our fist date consisted of meeting for drinks.  Second date was attending a concert, and last night was a nice dinner.  CJ is 38 and truly a nice guy but to say the least, mysterious.  I have yet to really trust anyone I meet through an online dating app, especially the unscrupulous Tinder.

Fear of Eternal Lonliness

Let's face it, we have all been there, the fear of being eternally lonely.  Eternally means for the rest of your life, forever, and forever.  Forever is a harsh word because it means forever. According to the blog, The Frisky a new study was done at the University of Toronto's Department of Psychology where it was discovered that the fear of being single leads both men and women to settle for relationships that don't fulfill them.  We all have some fear of dying.  But imagine that fear coupled with dying alone or having a heart attack while cuddled with your pet knowing that your life is going to be over, suddenly, alone.  "The thought of dying and no one finding me for days is one hellova scary thought.

Speed Dating Psychopath

 

So last night was supposed to be my first date with Stan the Speed Dater [remember names are changed to protect the not so innocent.].  The plan agreed upon was to pick me up outside my high rise.  I told him specifically that I would meet him outside of my building and for him to call me as soon as he was getting close.  I never give out my apt number and I never let any of my dates pick me up at my apartment.  Our date was set for 7:30pm.  at 7:10pm I HEAR A LOUD KNOCK AT THE DOOR.  "who would be knocking at my door at this time of night,." I thought to myself.

Stop Dating those Loons!

Let me interrupt this blog for a special message.  I have a date tonight and I do not want to go.  Do you get to the point that you are so over it, you just want to hide under an elusive rock and stay there until the nightmare is over?  I admit, I put myself in the situations of dating these ultimate losers.  People ask me all the time when I tell them my stories, ""how do you attract these men?" "Why do all the crazies find you?"  I ponder that question a lot and conclude it with, "at least I see the flags and get out before the relationship takes a serious turn." Just a bit of trying to pat myself on the back for being so brave in recognizing and discarding those dreaded loons.

My Tinder's First Blow Off

My Tinder's experience first demise, Chance.  I finally told the child off.   I know it sounds immature, to proclaim I told someone off, but this boy had no Chance with me, especially when 98% of him was made up of disingenuous proclamations.  I mean seriously, the dude was close to 40 years old and had the IQ and drive of that as an old decrepit dinosaur found stashed in thee basement of the Smithsonian.  When does it end?  Men never change.  My mom used to say to me, "Oh Jess you just need an older man, these others are such children."  I could never win with my mom, when I was 20 I needed to find someone 30, when I was 30 I needed to find someone who was 40: When I turned 40 I needed to find someone who was 50.  Does the quest ever end?  No because as long as there is a penis things never change.  So why not enjoy what is most pleasurable to me.  What is the difference between being hurt by a 25 year old or a 55 year old.  I prefer the 25 year old cause at least you get the hot factor in the mix. 

Does a Single Woman want a Man or a Guy?

What does a perpetually single woman want when it comes to a man?  I believe we want a guy[only for the moment, though].  Because those of the opposite sex that we tend to fascinate over tend to be guys.  Most are not even close to real men.  Real men are married, happily and know how to work out the differences  experienced in marriage.  He believes in true and long lasting love.  Guys just want a bang or if they are really weird they want just someone to be around to control with out the bang. They are no good for us women who have never married.

What am I Your Dog?

A month has passed since dating Chance.  The texts have gone to sweet and amorous to almost non existent.  He has made dinner for me, taken me to a few movies and there is no doubt he feels relentless passion for me.  How could I ever think differently that his true intentions of just being fucking companions would ever change.  This past Sunday I decided that it was time to let go of my "buddy".  Like I need any more male friends.  So I texted him, "Hey how are you." He immediately replied that he was working in the yard and was going to then hang out with his daughters. " What happened to the smiley faces and emoticon kisses", I asked myself.  What did I do wrong to emit this strange sense of unfamiliarity.  I had gone over the months worth of gazillion texts and I could not figure out what I had done wrong.  So I texted him back:  "I have been thinking that we are in two different places and that it better for us to move on.  I wish you the best of luck in all you do.  Take care."

Credit Score and the Selfish Man!

We went on our date Friday, he drove to my house, we took a cab to a nice sushi restaurant, had a few drinks and then a nice passionate kiss goodbye.  He liked me, so I thought.  Two weeks of texting, skyping and now the big date.  Still I had lingering issues with this 38 year old, "boy".  Granted he is responsible for two daughters but as the subsequent texts continued I learned more than I wanted or so desired about his riddled past which included his fucked up family.

A Wink, Smiley Face and a Kiss, but no Car!

So the texts continued.  Every day, night and in between.   He sent me selfies.  He texted me emoticons which consisted of smiley faces, winks and kisses.  We even skyped.  I had never skyped before just the typical Facetime.  Skyping was a whole new experience for me.  Chance told me he we would have to wait at least two weeks before we met due to his car being in the shop.  He was waiting for a part.  "Hmmm,"  I thought, "waiting for a car part for two weeks" and he is not renting a car to get around.  "I haven't been able to buy groceries either."

TINDER is not for Hopeless Romantic but the more Unscrupulous

I have tried all the dating sites, matchmakers, single cruises and events, speed dating, you name it I have tried it.  It has not been all fruitless.  I have gotten some pretty good dates and even some varied long term relationships. As technology has grown so has the interest in dating apps.  Most recently I tried Tinder.  A male friend of mine coaxed me into giving it a try.  I did my research due to my skepticism of a site where you make a decision based on a few pictures from a Facebook site.  From what I gathered it was mostly a hookup site similar to the dating app Grindr which is exclusive to gay men.

Welcome to the Eternal Single Woman

Some people say being married comes with many trials and tribulations.  Couples have to work hard at their marriage, constantly.  Financial issues, children, sex and the usual of just growing out of the marriage.  But what about us millions of eternally single women?  There are many of us all across the world.  Are we single by choice or is it just the luck of the draw, that we never met our soul mate? And is there really such thing as a soul mate